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He's lost track of how many times they've saved each other's lives. They've been friends for so long, teammates, brothers. He'd do anything for his friend, and he knows the feeling is mutual. But this- this is too much.

"No way." He crosses his arms, turns around. "Forget it, Roy. It's not going to happen."

"Come on, Dick. It'll mean so much to her." It's rather ironic that out of all the Titans, Dick and Roy are the two that drew the short straws for Christmas duty. While Vic and Kory would be taking over at noon, Christmas Day, Dick and Roy had to stick around until then. They weren't expecting much action, but you could never be sure. And so Roy has been trying his best to make it the perfect Christmas for Lian.

Dick gets that- he really does. He may not have a kid (and certainly isn't planning on it for a long time), but he does care for Lian and he wants her to have the best Christmas she can have.

But he draws the line at this.

"I don't care. I am not dressing up as Santa for you and propelling down the chimney with Lian's Christmas present." He starts to walk towards the door, intent on locking himself in his room for the rest of the holiday. Yes, it's not exactly full of holiday cheer, but if staying in his room will free him from Santa duty, he's all for it.

"But she's doubting Santa! She can't doubt Santa, yet. She's too young. So she needs to see him and-" Roy jumps in his way and he must stop short to avoid knocking him over.

"And I'm not doing it. If you're so worried, why don't you dress up and surprise her." He backs up, attempting to get around the archer.

"Because she'll know it's me. If I'm not around and Santa is, she'll know he's not real, because it's me in the suit." Roy reaches out and grabs his shoulders. "Come on, bro- help me make Christmas perfect for my kid. It's already shitty we're stuck in the Tower. At least make Santa real."

"Santa isn't real, in case you missed the memo. Some kids just catch on sooner than others." He removes Roy's arms from his shoulders and holds them out in front of him. "And don't you think she'll catch on if I'm not there?"

'Nope," Roy rips his arms out of Dick's grasp. "Because we're going to fake an emergency call. Then we'll argue about who's going to go and you say I need to stay because of Lian and you can handle it yourself and go running off. Then you come back with the new Robbie, dressed as an elf and-"

"Wait a second, since when is Tim involved? He's got a family; he can't just disappear on Christmas!"

"It'll be the middle of the night. And you're telling me he doesn't sneak out every evening anyways, to patrol? I know how you Bats work, Dick. It'll be nothing to him."

Roy…does have a point. "Okay, so maybe sneaking out isn't a big deal. But I highly doubt he's going to jump for joy at getting to dress up as one of Santa's elves for Lian." He makes a face, "Even if I were willing to dress up as Santa. Which I'm not," he quickly adds.

"If I have to get on my knees and beg, I will." Roy grabs onto him again. "I really need you to do this for me, bro. What happened to 'I'll do anything for you', huh?"

Dick turns away again, refusing to look at him. "Doesn't include dressing up as Santa Claus. Get it through your apparently miniscule brain, Roy. I am not dressing up as Santa." He manages to get past him, stalking out of the room. "Get Garth or Wally or someone else to do it, if it's that important."

When he passes Lian playing with her dolls and blocks in the hallway, he pretends that her angelic face doesn't do anything to him. Because- he is not dressing up as Santa. No way. Definitely not.

* * *

"Explain again why we're doing this?" Tim adjusts his felt hat.

Dick adjusts his sack, perched on the roof of Titans Tower. "Because Roy's a jerk, who's not above using his adorable kid to get his way."

"Oh. I see." Tim takes a deep breath, continuing, "Then mind telling me why I'm here?"

"Because Roy insisted that Santa needed an elf, that's why." Dick sighs, feeling his new beard. The Santa suit is warm and made of wool (he's not sure he wants to know why Roy "just happened" to have elf and Santa costumes lying around), but there's snow on the roof of the Tower, and it's got to be five degrees- cold enough that even in insulated gloves, his hands are beginning to go numb, gripping the ledge. "We don't have a chimney, so we're going to propel into the window," he speaks up. "Then you're going to knock over a chair and Roy's going to wake up Lian and go looking for the "intruder", which is when they'll come in the room and see us, setting up the tree and presents."

"I thought the tree was supposed to be set up already and Santa just put the presents in stockings on the mantel." Tim readies his grapple gun. "And, just to remind you, you owe me big time for this."

"I know, I know." Dick makes sure he won't drop the sack, and jumps off the roof, his jump-line catching his fall. He might owe Tim, but Roy owes him- and Roy is definitely going to pay up.

They sneak in through the window easily, and Tim, as planned, throws a chair over with a crash loud enough to wake the dead. Dick has grabbed the tree from his sack and wrestles it into the stand Tim holds steady. The beard and oversized belly don't make things easier, and because Roy insisted that Lian had to have a real Christmas tree, needles go flying everywhere.

"Ouch! That went almost in my eye, Dick!" Tim backs up, rubbing furiously. His hat is eschewed on his head and his red bowtie- part of his ridiculous costume, is crooked.

"Santa, Little Helper, Santa. They should be here soon. Help me with the lights." Tim helps him throw lights over the tree, and while Tim plugs in the Christmas lights, Dick starts to hang ornaments as quickly as possible.

"Come on, Lian. Let's check in the rec room-" Roy announces loudly, alerting the two vigilantes to hurry up with their decorating.

"Tinsel, Tim, the tinsel," Dick hisses, grabbing a full stocking out of his bag and placing it on the window sill.

"Weren't you the one against using our names?" He mutters, but throws tinsel over the tree and around the room.

"Shut up and get decorating." Dick grabs the wreath he brought with and places it on the window.

"Daddy! It's Santa!" The door opens without either of them realizing it and Lian comes dashing in. "And he brought an elf with him. Hi, Santa! Hi, Elf!"

"Ho ho ho, little girl. Were you good this year?" Dick kneels down, motioning for Tim to grab Lian's wrapped present and bring it to him.

"I was very good," Lian grins up at him. "Does that mean I get a present?"

"Of course!" He holds out the present for her and she takes it, clutching it to her chest. "Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas, Santa! Merry Christmas, Elf!" Lian turns to look at her father, before running up and hugging both Dick and Tim. "Thank you for the present."

"You're very welcome, little Lian. But my elf and I have to go now." Dick stands up.

"Because you have to bring presents to other kids, right?" Lian looks up at them. "Have fun!"

"We will," Tim nods, grabbing Dick's sack. "Good night, Lian."

Dick takes a step forwards to grab the bag from him, when his foot catches in the tinsel, and he trips. Were it any other occasion, he would have easily flipped and caught himself. But the extra belly adds to his weight, and the beard is long enough to get caught and he ends up falling into the Christmas tree. Roy, Lian and Tim watch frozen as the tree falls to the side, knocking into the window, which sends the wreath flying to land on his head. The hat and white wig get knocked off and Dick finds himself standing in an oversized suit, his fake stomach off to the side, the beard hanging half way off his face and having nothing conceal his supposed "secret" identity.

Oops.

"Uncle Dick!" Lian drops her present and comes rushing to him. The three men wait for the shoe to drop as Lian puts together that Santa isn't real. For everything that he went through today, he can't help but feel a bit sorry for Roy. Despite their efforts, Lian still found out that Santa doesn't exist.

"Hi, Lian," He scoops her up into his arms. "I'm really sorry-"

"Why didn't you tell me," She asks, hugging him tightly. "Why didn't you tell me you were Santa?"

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